When you were blinded by the light, but seem to be doing OK now… SCORE 47
Protect a tree with the corpses of his dead friends SCORE 39
Advanced Twitter SCORE 116
The icon Target uses for onions at checkout SCORE 56
I GUESS SCORE 45
The 8-pound killing machine SCORE 88
Inconceivable. SCORE 57
Welp. This is my life now. SCORE 39
Washer/dryer combo for sale SCORE 73
A lobsters life for me! SCORE 43
This is advanced homelessness SCORE 39
Walk and talk its. SCORE 73
Welcome! Our Kinder surrender checkpoints are your first stop, after which you are free to peruse our gun dispensaries… SCORE 72
Oh my lawd. SCORE 79
Easily the most underrated line. SCORE 47
James Fridman teaches students what a cool teacher should look like SCORE 106
Mama no. SCORE 52
Can’t teach an old lady new friends. SCORE 77
Challenge accepted… SCORE 63
+ cry. SCORE 118
I could live in this Matrix… SCORE 55
Timeout buddy. SCORE 25
*smol crunches* SCORE 38
The life of a book. SCORE 74
Self depracating life hacks. SCORE 95
Schrodinger’s Tupperware SCORE 48
Are you even real? SCORE 113
The beginning of a beautiful friendship. SCORE 115
The Motel 6 will provide. SCORE 64
That’s sure one way of putting it… SCORE 57
Nothing like a good trot in the snow… SCORE 69
Forbidden snack: The Banana Eel, named for its coloration and markings resembling a ripe banana SCORE 57