Come on in, the water’s fine! SCORE -14
One big gelatinous ooze. SCORE 402
How I view optimists, as a pessimist. SCORE 178
Accurate. SCORE 146
When you have a snake as a roommate. SCORE 207
I like the sound you make when… SCORE 12
Research doesn’t lie. SCORE 229
The trouble with being Canadian. SCORE 326
Same thing… SCORE 21
The Twortle SCORE 142
I’m a multi-tasking procrastinator. SCORE 188
When Tumblr gets deep. SCORE 441
Never trust a toddler. SCORE 82
I can’t wait to see this in my grandkids history books! SCORE 207
Scumbag NSA. SCORE 395
The baobab trees, Madagascar. SCORE 20
Non-essential organ support group. SCORE 221
2pactopus SCORE 113
Your cat hates you. SCORE 148
George R.R. Martin vs. J. K. Rowling. SCORE 22
Howling lessons SCORE 9
I can’t hear you. SCORE 23
Unlikely lines from a cosmetics commercial. SCORE 455
Why I don’t look out the window at night SCORE 193
Good Guy Dave. SCORE 460
Shotgun vs. Rosa parks. SCORE 291
Found my shirt. SCORE 117
Burn!!! SCORE 1
Literally all I ever see on Facebook SCORE 16
The girl in our math problems. SCORE 546
You just can’t trust an Oompa Loompa. SCORE 186
The power of barking SCORE 18
