Your cat hates you. SCORE 148
The girl in our math problems. SCORE 546
When you have a snake as a roommate. SCORE 207
Research doesn’t lie. SCORE 229
I like the sound you make when… SCORE 12
One big gelatinous ooze. SCORE 402
If Parks and Rec. characters were children’s books. SCORE 135
Never trust a toddler. SCORE 82
Scumbag NSA. SCORE 395
You just can’t trust an Oompa Loompa. SCORE 186
George R.R. Martin vs. J. K. Rowling. SCORE 22
The trouble with being Canadian. SCORE 326
Same thing… SCORE 21
The power of barking SCORE 18
Literally all I ever see on Facebook SCORE 16
The Twortle SCORE 142
How I view optimists, as a pessimist. SCORE 178
Why I don’t look out the window at night SCORE 193
When Tumblr gets deep. SCORE 441
2pactopus SCORE 113
Burn!!! SCORE 1
Accurate. SCORE 146
Come on in, the water’s fine! SCORE -14
Found my shirt. SCORE 117
Splash Mountain, you’re doing it right. SCORE 20
I can’t wait to see this in my grandkids history books! SCORE 207
I can’t hear you. SCORE 23
Good Guy Dave. SCORE 461
Unlikely lines from a cosmetics commercial. SCORE 455
Howling lessons SCORE 9
Non-essential organ support group. SCORE 221
I’m a multi-tasking procrastinator. SCORE 188
